Just One Thing

What do others give you? The Practice: Say Thanks. Why? What do you feel when someone thanks you for something? For a comment in a meeting, a task done at home, an extra step taken, an encouraging word. You probably feel seen, appreciated, that you matter to the other person....

What do you notice in people? The Practice: See the good in others. Why? Many interactions these days have a kind of bumper-car quality to them. At work, at home, on the telephone, via email: we sort of bounce off of each other while we exchange information, smile or...

Which wolf do you feed? The Practice: Feed the wolf of love. Why? I once heard a Native American teaching story in which an elder, a grandmother, was asked what she had done to become so happy, so wise, so loved and respected. She replied: "It's because I know...

What's the most important thing? The Practice: Keep your eyes on the prize. Why? Have you heard this saying? The most important thing is to remember the most important thing. What are the most important things to you? In your life as a whole? During a particular interaction with someone? Right this...

There's been mistreatment or injustice - now what? The Practice: Stay right when you're wronged. Why? It’s easy to treat people well when they treat you well. The real test is when they treat you badly. (Much of what I say here applies to concerns about injustice or...

Who Has Cared About You? The Practice: Feel cared about.  Why? Everyone knows what it’s like to care about someone. Remember being with a friend, a mate, a pet: you feel warmly connected, and want him or her not to suffer and to be happy. On the other hand, you’ve...

Are we there yet? The Practice: Relax, you've arrived. Why? We spend so much of our time trying to get somewhere. Part of this comes from our biological nature. To survive, animals - including us - have to be goal-directed, leaning into the future. It's certainly healthy to pursue wholesome...

What's Your Heart Saying? The Practice: Speak from the heart. Why? One Christmas I hiked down into the Grand Canyon, whose bottom lay a vertical mile below the rim. Its walls were layered like a cake, and a foot-high stripe of red or gray rock indicated...

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